Immediately following my wife Helen’s diagnosis of cancer, we were called upon pretty quickly to make transition from shock to plunging back into everyday life. In other words, living with a degree of routine in the shadow of personal crisis.
John Claypool, in his book Tracks of a Fellow Struggler said, “I have come to the conclusion that it is in the nature of God to speak to us in the language of events, and the nature of the church for men to share with each other what they thought they heard God say in the things that happened to them.”
I believe that. It may surprise you, but I think there are many portions of our lives that are a “dark mystery,” in Claypool’s words, “for which there is no satisfactory explanation.” Between the Father’s words, Though I walk through the valley of the shadow…I will fear no evil for You are with me (Psalm 23:4), and Jesus saying, Peace, I leave with you; My peace I give to you…Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid (John 14:27), I find tremendous peace and comfort, BUT, no answers.
I do not necessarily subscribe to the “all things happen for a reason” school of thought. But I do know that we don’t first get all the answers and then live our lives in light of that understanding. Insight many times comes not before, but through and after the experience. And specific answers and insights may never come in this life. Again, and I’ve said it often, “There are times that are not for understanding, but rather for trust.”
Have I trusted in and placed my full confidence in God Himself, and not whether I am experiencing trial or blessing. One day when I get to talk to the LORD about this, I might ask Him what this was all about. But probably not. Then, it won’t really matter.